


These Scars Are.

by megisrad



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Depression, M/M, Self-Harm, Triggers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-28
Updated: 2014-01-28
Packaged: 2018-01-10 08:27:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1157371
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/megisrad/pseuds/megisrad
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A very short one-shot about Stiles hurting and Derek wanting to help him. Warning: Triggers to self-harm.</p>
            </blockquote>





	These Scars Are.

**Author's Note:**

> Important: This fic contains self-harm and is rated so because of it. Just a short drabble after watching tonight's episode. Enjoy and let me know what you think.

He has these cuts. He has these scars. He has them running up his arms and down his thighs. They smell blood on him, but he won’t tell them why he reeks strongly of dried blood and injury. His eyes are dark and he looks as if he hasn’t slept in days. Stiles is hurting in more than one way. He’s hurting himself and he can’t tell them why. He feels pain when he cuts. He feels life and he knows he’s not dreaming. He feels as if he’s losing touch with reality and this is his grounding. 

Stiles isn’t proud of this and he finds no point in telling anyone. He has to be the strong human, because if he’s not than what does he have to offer to the pack? He’s not a crazy evil lizard turned werewolf in London, or a banshee, or a skilled hunter. He is simply Stiles and he feels that it’s simply not enough.

The boy is reaching the edges of extreme paranoia. He’s shaking and twitching and can’t stand to be to close to someone. He needs more space and he feels like he constantly can't breathe. He’s watching every corner waiting for this darkness to win and these nightmares to stop.

Derek came back to town and things went downhill after that. He tries to stay out of pack business these days, but it’s hard when everyone is asking him for favors and who is he to deny them. Stiles wants to keep helping, but he can’t help himself anymore.

On a dark day he finds himself at Derek’s loft. He quietly enters, not that it matters cause he’s sure Derek can smell him. He can smell the hurt, fear, and stench of blood.

Derek comes out of the darkness to greet the boy with silence and hesitation.

“Stiles,” Derek’s words are gentle as if he fears harsh words will break the boy. “I smell everything pouring off you…and it hurts me to know how much pain you're in,” Derek wraps his arms around the youth, trying to pull the pain from his wounds and cuts.

“The pain tells me I’m still alive.” Stiles flat tones.

“I can tell you that. You are alive, Stiles. I am here. We are here.” Derek whispers in the crook of the boys neck. A sob breaks from the youth’s lips.

“I feel so dead inside,” Stiles whimpers. “I need this pain to ground me. I’m not proud Derek…and part of me wished I was just a werewolf, so I can feel something other than numbness. I cut to stop the numbness”.

“I know Stiles, but I can’t watch you do this to yourself anymore. Let me help you.” There is wetness on Derek’s neck and he can tell the boy is silently crying now. He leads the boy to his bed in the corner and sits down. Derek pulls Stiles into his side and wraps his arm around the boy.

“I’m here,” Derek whispers and Stiles continues to cry. Derek lets him release his frustration. He doesn’t move Stiles when his leg is falling asleep or when the day fades away. He lets him fall asleep in the bed alongside him.

When Stiles wakes Derek is there. Derek has him tight and finally he feels something other than pain and numbness…he feels warmth and he knows he’s going to be ok.


End file.
